Discussions

Hello,  
 
I have an on going situation and I would like to know what everyone's opinions is on it. Any feedback would be appreciated.  
 
The mother of my child would like to hyphenate her married name onto my sons name last name. He is 5 years old. I would prefer that he make the decision himself when he's older.  
 
On a side note she has done everything that she can to not use his real last name in any situation possible. Even on his pre-school diploma she used her now husbands last name instead of mine, even though they weren't married at the time. Lots of other examples but this is just one.  
 
She is now going to take it to a trail literally over just hyphenating his last name. I'm not sure what I should do. I am quite concerned about the heavy cost of a trail, especially if I were to lose.

Are you allowing new husband to adopt your son ( giving up rights to your son) ? If not why does he need to take his last name, hyphenated or not?

Your kid is still your kid regardless of his name. If it's not worth it for you to take it to court, don't - let your ex change his name.  
 
I grew up with a hyphenated last name. I dropped half of it in my 20s because I got tired of writing the whole thing. Like you said, he can change it as an adult- whichever way he wants.  
 
If it's really important for your ex that his name be hyphenated, go with it unless it's equally important for you that it not be. Maybe you'll get something in return that's really important to you.

No I certainly not allowing that. I could understand that, if that were the case. I don't know why she wants to do it. It appears she will do anything to cause misery.

Fight to keep the name given to the child on the birth certificate. They will appreciate it later.  
 
My daughter did not have the same last name as me and it was not a problem as many more mothers are taking this route. I had to learn to respond to "Mrs. H" but that was a minor glitch for a few years that the mother should be able to deal with ... if she really cares about the child.  
 
Make sure the school the child is attending is aware of the situation and that the proper name is used on all official documents.  

Have you looked there for information? It seems to me that she would need your consent unless she has sole custody of the child. I don't think she'd get very far in taking it to court - it is not a thing you can make someone else do.  
 
If she has a reason, such as other children with the new husband and she wants him to have part of the new husband's last name so he feels included, I can see that. You may consider it if you think it will benefit him in some way, but otherwise you could counter that he can hyphenate with HER maiden name and she can choose to do the same with other kids.  
 
ex/  
 
Child's current name = Joe Smith  
Her married name = Jones  
Her maiden name = Brown  
 
If she wants half-siblings to share a name then she could change his name to Joe Smith-Brown and any future siblings could be Jane Jones-Brown, Bill Jones-Brown, etc.  
 
I get not wanting your child to carry another man's name, and leaving the decision to him when he is older.  
 

Fight for your parental rights - and if there should be a Trial, it should be you charging her with falsifying identification records - do it on your childs behalf. SHE is the one who is exhibiting illegal behaviors - cut it at the bud NOW!!! Do you have evidence of her "name swap" behaviors - that is what I would focus on now - just compile your evidence of her falsely representing your biological childs identification.

I also say fight for your rights. If the child has your last name at birth then to bad so sad. Maybe she should have thought about it then. My husbands ex also wanted to change their kids last name. Nope judge did not allow it as my husband didn't want it changed

Did they go to court in Brandon where the judge denied the name change?

It did go to court but in Saskatchewan

i think the name should stay and i would make her take me to court, unless there is a huge reason to add a hyphenated name change then i wouldnt indulge her