Discussions

When they are old enough to look after them by themselves. Cleaning and changing earrings takes time and responsibility. The youth should be able to do this on their own but with guidance the first few times.

In all honesty, isn't that solely up to the parents and /or caregivers. So on that note, any age they decide on. So to you Q. >:>:>ersonally it is so adorable seeing infants with pierced ears.

Sorry, but I don't agree that it should be up to the parent or caregiver, I think it should be up to the person getting their ears pierced to make that decision when they are old enough.  
 
My mom got my younger sister's ears pierced when she was one and I recall her at (at about age 4?) Playing on the floor and she got her earring caught in the carpet and it ripped her earlobe. No matter how 'cute' it looks, they can get caught on things, get ripped out, or become infected. Therefore, I don't think they should be done at such a young age.

Up to the parent.  
 
Everyone will have their own opinion. Right or wrong, up to the parent.  
 
If the parent wants to get them done as babies and are willing to clean and care for them all is good.  
 
If as an outsider seeing this baby with pierced ears and you think it is wrong - don't look at the child or worry about it, it is not your child.

When old enough to take care of them.

I agree with around the age of 14-16. Old enough to save their own money to have it done (hopefully earning it) and old enough to be responsible for care. Old enough to decide as well. It is only a vanity thing...an extra...not a need. Extras can wait until a later date. Now, if put off until teenhood, this can be a good lesson in patience, saving for something specific and exciting, & knowing what is important & just frivolous. This is what we have chosen to follow.  
 
I have heard concerns about the ear not being fully developed before...14 (?), and possible damage that could be done to the cartilage of the ear if it is done too young. It was so many years ago that I read that though, that I no longer remember the age.  
 
It is good to take into consideration the possibilities as ~M~ mentioned as well.  
 
I don't judge others for their choices in this...it is their choice. This is just what I decided to do and my reasons why.  
 
Edited by Flutterby, 2019-09-14 18:36:50

No cartilage in the ear lobe so that excuse is out. It’s a parents choice on if and when they do it. at the same time most kids by age 8/9 are more than capable of cleaning and caring for earrings. Responsibility for me as a parent should start being taught around the same age therefore to me 14/16 is way older then I’d make mine wait.( I was also graced with smart, responsible, old souled kids too)

So my husband and I decided we would wait until our daughter was older to pierce her ears: basically after 5 but when she could choose. Low and behold, last year (when she was still 3), there was a piercer (certified) at the Icelandic festival in gimli. She said she wanted her ears pierced, and went through with it. Still has them in too. We put hoop earrings in after and she hasn’t had an issue.

Got my daughters done at 6 months . Wasn’t hard to keep clean .

Depends on the child. Our one daughter, we didn’t feel was quite ready until she was 10. She wasn’t quite mature enough to at least help with care and cleaning. 10 was the right age for her. One of our other daughters was 8 and likely could have had hers done a lot sooner. She is very responsible and mature for her age. Funny enough though, years later, it’s the responsible one who really doesn’t have much interest in earings anymore and the other one is extremely responsible now and much more careful with her jewelry items.  
FYI, if you want it done at a tattoo parlour, they often will not do it before age 12. I would at least recommend a salon with a good reputation as well. Sometimes the cheaper and more popular places can spell disaster in terms of infections, knowledgeable staff, etc.

Personally, if you want to accessorize your child's head like one does with cheap plastic rhinestones on an old pair of jeans, using an bedazzler... go ahead, but you're doing it to amuse yourself -not your infant daughter. No one is going to stop you from doing it. I'm just glad most here feels that waiting it out is the better option. We waited until our daughter broached us and we discussed it then & there and allowed her to make her own decision whether she really wanted done soon or to hold off until the time was right for her. She waited quite a while 'til sixteen and did it together with friends because she wanted it to be a "special moment" ...her moment, not ours. That's the point I'm driving at. Don't get obsessed so much that you're practically taking away your daughters steps in growing up into an independent adult. Let them discover, question, educate, evaluate and determine their own opinion on how to act on it. It doesn't mean you don't get the final say on what they do... You still are the parent and will always call the shots. But something as minor as an ear piercing could be an opportunity in allowing your child feel they contribute in making their own personal choices . I feel that if you start so early in their lives in micromanaging and doing nearly everything they're not living their childhood lives... You are just re-living yours.  
 
Just my opinion, I could be wrong.  
 
Edited by snowman5, 2019-09-15 22:57:20

Snowman5 put it perfectly. Allow her to exercise her own autonomy. It's her body, it should be her choice whether she wants her ears pierced or not.

I think I would echo some other users and say that you should wait until your children are old enough to provide informed consent.  
 
While I think we can all accept that ear piercing is fairly innocuous in terms of pain, it contributes to their identity and that should be something that each of us carve out for ourselves.  
 
I had my ear pierced at a pretty advanced age, 13 or 14, it was something I really wanted done. I was for sure old enough to make that decision for myself. But, not everyone is the same.  
 
What we really want to avoid is doing things to people (regardless of age) that they aren't providing an informed consent to. I'm not gonna call CFS on someone for getting their infants ear pierced, but I think they should probably consider the reality of doing that to anyone without them understanding or wanting it done.  
 
It's vanity. Pure and simple. Which is fine. But not when you do it to a child.

I'm only going by what the article/news report said, and it gave a valid *reason* (not excuse) to consider possible damage done to the ear if done too young. That is the important factor, not one to be so easily dismissed.  
 
As you stated, our choice was/is our choice (and others' here too), so I would ask that you don't belittle and discredit it. There were more factors involved in our decision than what you assumed. Old soul here, with adult down to early school age kids...  
 
Responsibility & working well/hard are taught from very early on for all of my kids (and most likely by the others of the same mindset), not starting at 14-16 when ears may get pierced, as insinuated. They should certainly be ready long before then, and mine would be. Teaching responsibility is an ongoing process from very little.  
 
Teaching kids to work, earn & save (not just be given money) for a desire, & to learn to wait, maybe sacrifice something, & also to choose for themselves is important. These were our *main* reasons. Giving an age gives them something to look forward to, kind of a "grown up" stepping stone. None looked on it as a punishment. I never did either. It gives them time with no huge, imminent pressure to spend & get [i]now[/i]. They will also put a larger personal value on it being an accomplishment of their own.  
 
I want to state again that is just [i]not[/i] a necessity, and it isn't cheap. Each daughter learns this here. Our family money was/is directed toward needs (that first), rarely material wants. That is a healthy way to view finances and sometimes teaching this saves a child from a harder life lesson later on when wants are bigger, more urgently pressing and more expensive. There is so much power in teaching kids these values and finding value in something other than "things." It is no longer common for this to be taught anymore in our society in the age of I want it, I get it, no effort on my part (not saying yours are that way), maybe even pay later.  
 
Our next one who got to decide on her ears is almost at her goal. Waiting has taught patience. Earning & saving has taught work ethic, diligence, choices and sacrifice. Waiting on ear piercing is not the only thing that has taught these values, however, but it is a rewarding one! There is excitement! There are other ways to teach these things, yes, but this is one way of many that works well in our family.

I had to wear dresses to church for a year when I was 13 before I got my ears pierced and then mom let me pierce how ever many times I wanted. Here in that was in the 90s when ear piercing was the to - do thing.  
My nieces don't have to get theirs pierced until they are old enough to want them themselves.  
I think its best to let them decide when they want to get their ears pierced. Their ears, their choice.