Discussions

So how many people out there are unhappily married? I know that I am. It seems that we are not friends anymore, yet we have a somewhat active (not overly exciting for me) sex life. We have children in their teens and I feel that they are the only reason I stick around. I have asked my spouse during one of our not so friendly moments what we have in common anymore and she could not give me an answer other than the kids. In my opinion my feelings started waning about 6 -7 years ago. Work and finances, then were stressful on both of us, our sex life went from what I thought was great to what has now become boring and routine. When I ask what she wants sexually she just replies "you". In my opinion, if I do not know what she wants, how am I to help her out? Not to mention how she wants "me". I have tried dropping hints about what I want, but all I get is excuses for not wanting to engage. For the record... what I am asking for is really nothing more than some dirty talk, telling of stories and dressing up in lingerie. I could maybe understand if I was asking for her to allow someone else into the activities or something else "weird".  
On the nonsexual side, when we do try to converse, it seems that no matter how I say things, they get misinterpreted and then she is mad at me for what ever reason. She says she loves me, others say she loves me and worships the ground I walk on, but yet I can't help feel that she is fooling herself. I can't remember the last time that I told her I love her and meant it. I don't even say it anymore. It's to the point that I have considered just getting another bed and putting it in my office so I can get some sleep without having to be near. Sure it might sound like it would be easier to move out... but what about the kids?  
 
So is there any one else out there going through this kind of thing or am I all alone in this lonely married world?  
 
Edited by quiver, 2010-01-08 11:07:15