Discussions

This is a discussion or a place to state the obvious things that some people unfortunately were not taught when they were young, that could benefit them in life if they changed just a few little bad habits..  
 
I'll start.  
 
Walking around with your hands in your pants pockets. If you are 17, this is probably fine but when you are in a workplace, you need to make a good first impression.  
 
Unless you need to breathe through your mouth, close it when you aren't talking. You appear smarter. :-)  
 
If we all took into consideration a few things about our first impressions, we might get that job we've applied for or that date that we would have otherwise missed out on. First impressions are everything.

Put your phone down when eating dinner with someone !

Don't stare at people, it makes them want to get away from you as quickly as possible.

Don't get rude when someone calls you sir or ma'am! I'm not doing it because I think you're old, I'm doing it because I was raised with respect.

for god sakes, clean yourselves... and pull your pants up!

Please and Thank you!!! It seems those words have been forgotten by a lot

tamedape00 said "for god sakes, clean yourselves... and pull your pants up! "

I was to mention also. Wear your pants at the waist not at the bottom of your hips so you do not look so lazy with no caring in the world

How to do little things like how to check if food is actually done. How to do a basic stitch. There really just needs to be a life lessons and basic how to live on your own classes, mandatory for grade 12.

Not specific to a mother. Father, Mother, TEACHER, whatever. Make sure your kid knows how to budget and what to do with their money and credit/credit cards. It is so so so important yet no one sat me down and told me right and people end up with credit problems so fast when they don''t know what they are going to be up against.  
 
Edited by KC*, 2016-09-07 16:57:27

Chew with your mouth closed for the love of God.

KC* said "Not specific to a mother. Father, Mother, TEACHER, whatever. Make sure your kid knows how to budget and what to do with their money and credit/credit cards. It is so so so important yet no one sat me down and told me right and people end up with credit problems so fast when they don''t know what they are going to be up against.     Edited by KC*, 2016-09-07 16:57:27"

So many new adults are unprepared financially when first being on their own. Especially when they're practically handing out credit cards in post secondary schools.  
 
Also how to cook. An actual proper well balanced meal.

Whomever the "parental figures" are in a young person's life they have a responsibility to make sure they are prepared to function independently. A dying art by the looks of things....  
 
Anyway: "never wash your colours and your white clothes together"

How to plant flowers and/or garden, how to grocery shop, handle money, respect, be honest, eat at the table with no TV on (we had no cell phones) be kind to others. Some of what I taught my daughter - work hard, be respectful, have manners, save money, respect the earth, be kind to yourself.

She taught me that every person is an individual, and not to be judgemental.

How to sew on a button. How to properly put out a kitchen fire. How to clean up after yourself. How to use your 'indoor voice'.

(1) Don't believe everything people say, their actions tell the truth... (2)put your family before yourself..

...how to be more confident, sexy (not sleezy) but not dressed like Grandma all your life (too reserved!!). Failure is okay sometimes...self forgiveness...looking after myself/feel good instead of always pleasing everyone else!! Probably just the era I grew up in...that generation didn't discuss much or get too personal..everyone had there duties/chores/roles!! (I'm not complaining about the chores though...builds character, etc!!)

don brown said "She taught me that every person is an individual, and not to be judgemental. "

I think we have all learned something from this post.

There are things in this topic that I agree with completely, most of them on the common courtesy idea, but there are other things that are things that bother us at a personal level without knowing circumstance or anything about the person.  
People with their hands in their pockets while working does bother me, we can be in a pen of cattle trying to sort them and someone may be walking around the pen with their hands in their pockets. First off I think that it is unsafe just in case you stumble, the second thing is how do you herd cattle with your hands in your pockets, but then the person with their hands in their pockets makes a hissing sound and the cattle turn and head the other direction, so the objective was achieved even if it didn't suit me.  
The bathing and staring I can understand from everyday life. I start the day off usually as clean as everyone else, including clean clothes, but sometimes things happen and you end up pretty grubby and have to make a quick trip to Brandon for repairs without the opportunity to get cleaned up or change clothes. For some reason that is unknown, these are the times that I end up getting asked to maybe stop at other places to pick up things I had no intention of getting, in places I didn't want to be, mostly because I'm so grubby, but I do it because someone asked. Depending where you go, you get those looks of do you own a awaking machine, or have you heard of a shower, and people will stare, but the truth is in the same person as if I was all cleaned up. People stare because a person or situation is different, but without communication between people, people just assume they know, and at times that is being judgemental.  
Society seems to have this idea that being outside of the norm is really bad, but at times the norm is something that is taught to us, and in a mistaken way. Think of the word geek, and then think Bill Gates.  
It's late, and I'm not going to proof read, so forgive the mistakes.

First impressions are not everything. Unless of course, you''re an overly judgmental prick. Sometimes people can surprise you when you give them a chance. A wise man (ex boss of mine) once told me: It''s the lasting impression that is the lasting impression.  
 
Sometimes people can be nervous. Which is a natural thing in a new environment. It's up to you how you choose to treat/view others. It's not right to look down at others, and decide your any better or worse than someone else. Nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself. But not when its at the expense of others.  
 
Then, if your mother had taught you right: you probably would have already known this.  
 
Edited by LoadedGun, 2016-09-08 05:18:35

LoadedGun said "First impressions are not everything. Unless of course, you''re an overly judgmental prick. Sometimes people can surprise you when you give them a chance. A wise man (ex boss of mine) once told me: It''s the lasting impression that is the lasting impression.     Sometimes people can be nervous. Which is a natural thing in a new environment. It's up to you how you choose to treat/view others. It's not right to look down at others, and decide your any better or worse than someone else. Nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself. But not when its at the expense of others.     Then, if your mother had taught you right: you probably would have already known this.     Edited by LoadedGun, 2016-09-08 05:18:35"

There are so many times in our lives where where we only get one chance to make our impression. Look at all the dating posts here.

crop said "    LoadedGun said "First impressions are not everything. Unless of course, you''re an overly judgmental prick. Sometimes people can surprise you when you give them a chance. A wise man (ex boss of mine) once told me: It''s the lasting impression that is the lasting impression.     Sometimes people can be nervous. Which is a natural thing in a new environment. It's up to you how you choose to treat/view others. It's not right to look down at others, and decide your any better or worse than someone else. Nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself. But not when its at the expense of others.     Then, if your mother had taught you right: you probably would have already known this.     Edited by LoadedGun, 2016-09-08 05:18:35" There are so many times in our lives where where we only get one chance to make our impression. Look at all the dating posts here. "

____________________________________  
 
Are you really going to argue with someone for sharing what their Mother taught them???  
 
My mother taught me to "speak up for those who cannot or don't", be an example of an "intelligent person" - "use your brain, not your body to get a man" - seek and you shall find- & and if its meant to be it is meant to be! She taught me to be creative, to sew, and that people are just people, no matter where you go in this world!  
 
Edited by whatthewhat, 2016-09-08 07:41:59

Maybe the problem is that way to many people believe that first impression is the most important one. If we are going to make decisions about people because of how they look in a picture, or maybe even on comments that they make while trying to present themselves on a dating site, we might be judging by all the wrong things. I couldn't even imagine what I would say,on a dating site, if I was trying to "sell" myself to others. The answers people give to questions sometimes depends on the day they are having, or the mood they are in, and those answers can be interpreted in different ways.

don brown said "Maybe the problem is that way to many people believe that first impression is the most important one. If we are going to make decisions about people because of how they look in a picture, or maybe even on comments that they make while trying to present themselves on a dating site, we might be judging by all the wrong things. I couldn't even imagine what I would say,on a dating site, if I was trying to "sell" myself to others. The answers people give to questions sometimes depends on the day they are having, or the mood they are in, and those answers can be interpreted in different ways. "

I know my posts on here sure differ depending on what MOOD I am in. I suffer with MS - and sometimes my frustration gets quite high just reading some of these posts - and then when I post, I just errupt !!! Lol. Seriously, you are right about the "day they are having or the mood they are in" - and yes, perception plays a huge role in our "Impression" of someone - whether it be the First impression, or the Last impression. But for me - I too believe it is the "Last Impression" that sticks in my mind when meeting someone -

JackAzz said "Chew with your mouth closed for the love of God. "

And especially don't talk with food in your mouth. The most grossest thing to see at a dinner table. For sure your first and LAST date!!! I don't know if taking smaller bites may help, but people respect you more if waiting for a reply and you simply put your hand up and finish chewing and swallowing before speaking!

Let's take a moment and all be honest with ourselves here. Every single one of us could take something away from this thread that we could work on. None of us are beyond needing help in some area of our lives. We are not perfect and we should always be striving in our lives to be a better person. Complacency doesn't help anyone.  
 
If everyone one here saw something in their lives stated here, that they know is hindering them a little, then I have accomplished exactly what I set out to do with this thread.  
 
Common sense is taught, it doesn't come naturally. You'll know that by the neighborhood kids who ask inappropriate questions or walk into your home without knocking because no one taught them how to behave around other people. A lot of effort has to be put into someone to make them who they are. Some people, unfortunately, were not taught so many things that could help them in our society.

whether mom or dad taught you is irrelevant but every adult should know  
 
at least a little about home repairs! how to fix a leaky toilet, how to shut off the water, hang a door ect  
 
how to change a flat, change your oil and the basics of how a car works so when you take it to the shop they cant snow you  
 
how to cook something not microwavable, how to bake  
 
sew, finances, how to start a fire and scrounge or stuff you need and other life skills  
 
the most important one is the confidence to try to learn, now a days if mom or dad didnt teach you you can teach yourself off google, dont be afraid to try you are better then you think

Who ever crop is..... Please really? You sound so self righteous I just had to write something. If you would like to go for lunch with me and my 3 boys your more than welcome. I will even buy. And I'm sure during lunch I could pick away at you things your mother should have taught you. Like keeping your ridiculous opinions to yourself. Email me when your good to go for lunch. Thxs.

Ian123 said "Who ever crop is..... Please really? You sound so self righteous I just had to write something. If you would like to go for lunch with me and my 3 boys your more than welcome. I will even buy. And I'm sure during lunch I could pick away at you things your mother should have taught you. Like keeping your ridiculous opinions to yourself. Email me when your good to go for lunch. Thxs. "

did i miss something? i dont see where crops posts are bad at all, first impressions sometimes is the only impression you get, yet sometimes people do come out of a bad first impression given the chance too, many many dont get that chance so its good to try not to mess it up  
 
my Dad also taught me to take things with a grain of salt and to try and read posts in the most positive way, sometimes you can put your own negativity on the written word that wasnt meant to be there, of course we are all wrong sometimes too, another great lesson

Have a 14 & 17 year old at home told daily what is expected and what is inappropriate. Every. Day. As a parent, I continue and hope/pray one day it will stick.  
 
What more can parents do? How about putting the onus on the individual? Is it the person who lead the Horse to water to blame when the horse doesnt drink?