Discussions

Last month my husband and I had our wedding.  
My sister in law is a photographer and her/my brother decided they would like to offer their gift to us to have her photograph our wedding.  
After the wedding- my sister in law sent out the email of the website with the password to see the photos. She sent it to my husband and I, my parents, and my siblings. Being preoccupied with my newborn I did not have time to download/view the photos before I started getting messages from my family and how great the pictures were. I was a little annoyed they got to see them before my husband and I.  
I was going to overlook this until today when I found out she printed some photos for my mother.  
I have yet to print any for ourselves and was going to send some to my parents as part of their Christmas gifts and now can't.  
I know this is all a grey area because we are family. But do I have a right to be annoyed? She wouldn't have sent the photos or printed any for someone that was a client I'm assuming?  
Do I tell her I'm upset by this?

I think maybe you're being a little over sensitive. I know these days most photographers will put up a blog of photos on their website (not all of them) but a sneak peek of some of the photos from a wedding for absolutely anyone to see unless they are specifically told not to by the bride/groom.  
I don't really see the point in saying anything about it as what's done is done. I'm sure it wasn't done intentionally to be disrespectful to you or to upset you.  
Congratulations on your marriage and your new baby. Life's too short to sweat the small stuff.  
Enjoy your new family and move on

It's not so much what you're saying...most people would say that...it's that you kind of took it to the next level posting it. That takes a fair bit more initiative than most in your situation would take over something like this.  
 
The only reason I'm taking the initiative to post this is because it's a symptom of a larger issue that happens to be my number one trigger. This is the worst thing in your life?I think you'll be O.K.

What the op is looking for is advice on how to handle this. She is upset and wants to know how to handle it. She never said this was the worst thing in her life. She said it is a grey area and doesn't know how to proceed. I agree I also would have been upset. As for advice you need to decide whether bringing it up and risking making your SIL and the parents feel bad or upset is worth it or should you just move on. It won't be easy but things can't be changed now. Only you can make that decision as we don't know the people in involved or what your relationship with them is like. Good luck

I would likely be a little bit upset too however what's done is done. You could pull your sister-in-law side and very nicely tell her that you wish you would've been able to see the pictures first before showing other people and explain that you wanted to give them as gifts. I wouldn't get too much further into it than that so to risk your relationship over it. I also wouldn't involve anybody else because it doesn't have anything to do with them other than the fact that they received your pictures. By explaining it to your sister-in-law maybe it would make her think twice before doing it to somebody else. If they did a good job and your happy with them then thank them for taking great pictures to remember your day then move on. Unfortunately we have to let things slide a bit sometimes if the relationship is worth a lot. Try not to stress or dwell on it. And congrats on your marriage!

Thank you popgoestheweasel.  
I know what's done is done but I'm wondering if I should mention something to them nicely to explain that I feel they are our photos to distribute to people and not theirs? I feel they took advantage a bit of fact we are family and doing what she pleases with them.  
If it were a client she likely wouldn't have sent them out to others or printed some off. Which is why it's all a grey area lol.  
It's not the worse thing that's happened and I don't want a lot of drama but I feel they are our photos and not hers to print for people send to whoever she likes. Yes? No? :s

I would be upset as well. If being a photographer is her job, she should be treating everyone the same. I understand that they would have sneak peeks but I would assume the photographer would ask first. I would tell your sil that you were upset, at least clear the air. Maybe it was just excitement on her part, but making prints for others before the actual couple prints any is in bad taste, in my opinion.

That normally a photographer sends the album link to the bride/groom and it would be up to them to pass the link on to other family members if they wanted to? I would say the same protocol should have been followed here-this was a gift to the bride and groom, not to the whole family. I would likely mention how disappointed you were about how this was handled. For the sake of family relations it may not.be worth making a big fuss and having a falling out over it-but mentioning it is appropriate.