Discussions

Here id like to bring up a topics that seems to be avoid, I imagine mainly cause no one knows how to address it even the professionals which is sad. Ive been around our blocks all my life from highs to the lows ive been your neighbor, your friend a foe and an enemy, Id like to bridge the gap from the ones which have been called the innocent more less don’t know whats going on behind the curtain, and that hoodlum that as soon as you first glance a second at them your not sure if you should walk away "for your own protection" or pretend that they just aren't there and carry one blinded to the fact that no one really understand both sides of a world we all share. Ill try and stay bias, be fare, this isnt going to be a topic where we bash ones opinion but still hear what people have to say..  
To my understanding 65% (I made up this percent) of the population in Brandon and surrounding area don’t understand whats really happening on the streets, first reaction to hearing the term already drew an opinion on how your feel about the topic. Could be: what is I talking about, or we know its all.. messed up, but that’s not my life so who cares, or maybe your one of those people the innocent threw away. Just to be stuck on "street level" parameters. Ill share real life stories about myself for reference with the topic, but I don’t want anyone's names mentioned or i:ncluded crimes, or downplaying anyone's position, keeping it all in a say hypothetical standard, if that’s fare,  
 
As ive mentioned I'm not speaking for anyone ill use my own experiences to share to the public how to help, and understand where I can. An example: the one most worst thing you can do to someone that you see either falling into an extremely bad habit is make them start lying to 'you' about it.. Yes its your fault they are living a lie, cause of making them/us insecure or to hide the fact in all. Don’t ask questions you already know the answers to .. Who asks a well off business person if they are doing drugs.. You ask cause you already know… now you’ve caught them off guard and they need to protect their 'crutch' whatever it maybe and then deny it .. Maybe you don’t know how to address it which is fine, but don’t make them start lying to you, cause you will force your friend or family member into a manifest of their own lies.. That's because.. They have a problem… yet following this always ends the same. I've seen it, felt it and its been done to me.. You go and tell 'everyone' before 'you' know what's actually happening, Due to some movie you saw or been watching, then say dumb things like: "You're all part of "that" world you know, that’s what happens when you are stuck in "that" world with "those" people." ..and that’s not you so you cut them off .. Which bring up my last point in this intro,  
Don't Ever Cut Them Off.. And I don’t mean money cause yeah you might not want to give them money that in my experience is a bad idea ive asked for money and said it was for 'Blank' cause I need 'Blank' cause of 'this' reason or 'that' yetta yetta.. No, I mean don’t cut them off from your life, cause they're not burning bridges which is so commonly used to justify why you or they (not everyone's guilty of this, only the guilty ones are of course) and left them, where-ever, stopped talking to them cause they're bad on your image or feelings.. When you cut them off and burn that bridge.. Where do they go now.. To the next innocent friend or family member? They've heard your rumor about them, cause its been going on for a while or so. Then they decide cut them off early, or, they ride an individuals case so they act up, and in my experience if you get treated like a pile of garbage when you haven't done anything then, whatever miswell be a pile of garbage, cause who cares (is the feeling we get from it. It doesn’t help) The street will welcome them with open arms so it can fuel more problems.. Who doesn’t like being destructive when they are frustrated or mad at them selves or/and everything around them.  
Do you know what I've told people I once knew as friends, that I've helped get a head of me (and get pushed back at times) I say "Look I cant give ya any cash or my car, and you cant make me feel bad about, what it is that got you worked up, I didn’t put you there, But…." (and this is the most important part for any lost soul to hear) ".. But.. I am still right here.." that’s all just those last five words can save a friendship, a whole lot of sorrow and loneliness, feeling of banishment, it can keep a family together.. "I am still right here.." That lets them know you ain't helping which isnt ideal to the addict but you haven't left them either they’ve a couch or a food.. Not a locked door and a funny look .. But that’s one insight..  
 
(A little History of me)  
Before you start thinking here's another "look at me another saved soul by God, Allah, Budda, Ishmu, or the giant spaghetti monster in the sky (it’s a thing look it up)" I've done bad things, ive done amazingly helpful things for people in need, and in greed. Ive been cut off (a number of times). I've been accused when I didn’t, so I made it to be true, I made it to be true causei didn’t know what else to do. I have a career, collage degree in a trade with extras, I fell so far down the drug train that I lost my house, my business, the girl, and the dog, been in and out of jail and in rehab, and when I say this I don’t mean this all happened in a year I dropped out of high school (went back for mature student) cause I was making more money in grade 9 and 10 then my parents at that time, work during the day and partied all night for almost 2 decades. Ive fiii-nally started getting some of my family back, got a family doctor trying something, cause what I was doing wasn’t working, the rest in due time..  
I'm sharing this (I know it’s a long read) cause I want the "Other side" or the "Innocent" people to be aware of things they don’t see. Just like how it would have been nice to know what we didn’t see… ill try and keep the host position for this forum. I've wanted to do this for a while just, what to say, where to start this I'snt about me or any one person. So don’t think its me complaining about where I went wrong (I have) but I've been around the block and half way back, and enough bad stories to make an old man cry.  
 
Suggestions on proceeding? is this a good topic? Please ask questions, if its discriminating towards an individual or if I find it to direct, for the answer will cause problems, ill say so. I wont make anything up and ill tell ya things you don’t want to know. As I plan to host this. please no names. not trying to out anyone. And please if ya can, ask and tell in a "theoretical way" we don’t need this to be a study group 'they' cause enough problems on their own.  
thank you,  
 
Edited by ThatGuyYouOnceKnew, 2021-01-20 22:34:31

I think what your trying to discuss is great.  
I would like to engage but I think you need to edit your post into smaller more defined paragraphs. It's not that it's long, that's fine, it's just a HUGE wall of text that is very difficult to follow along with.  
 
I think you will get more replies if you make some simple edits now that you have the jist of what you were wanting to say.

yes I was wondering about that ill proof read it again maybe break it up a bit I'm trying to build a bridge not a wall  
 
And thank you for your feedback Nunya I like the user name, and to others in email I understand some of this is not ideal for discussion reads (keep it hypothetical)  
 
Edited by ThatGuyYouOnceKnew, 2021-01-21 17:20:44

This is a great topic. People can be so judgemental these days. There by the grace of God, Allah, spaghetti monster, go I. All it takes is one bad, crappy thing happening to a person to throw them on a bad course. I believe there are very few truly “bad” people in this world. Most are just trying to survive. I believe in “do unto others”. Treat everyone you meet with compassion and respect because you don’t know where they are or where they have been. You might be in a place some day looking for that compassion for yourself.

Where are you now ?  
What are some of the amazing things you did for other people ?

My take on it is that is just our Human Beings species doing what we all choose to do or how we all choose to act. Who designed us in the first place or whether we just evolved from thin air is up for debate but the design seems flawed right from the start. Every new day we have to play a new card from the deck of life and play it to the best of our ability which obviously i:ncludes choices to make which can affect others and of course us. The animal kingdom is somewhat similar except its eat or be eaten which is even a tougher go. I think we will all get a second go at it in another dimension somehow and hopefully this life this time around was only a test to see how we would do and maybe gain some knowledge and experience from everyday life as we know it here. None of us asked to be here and yet here we are . The only thing so far that I can see that helps or solves some of life’s dilemmas is Love. It is the most powerful feeling or thing that we have right here right now. It just might get us through to whatever you think is the next chapter of the Human Being experience. . This is just my opinion and may be slightly off topic.

holy f*** Batman

...bridge you are trying to build? To who, how and why. I kind of hear what your saying but its long and not to the "bridge" your looking to achieve.  
 
> I'm trying to build a bridge not a wall

well as the pandemic would go, i am currently living back at the family farm, it was a long and hard discussion with a number of promises, which I've broken in the past, that's where i am physically,  
 
Mentally I am often confused about that question my self, what I'm trying this time around is in fact new to me and I struggle with it a lot, but what it was I was doing clearly wasn't working out for me. I am doing nothing. I am learning new hobbies, getting back into drafting which i only did in an amateur sense before, but learning with "AutoCAD Invent" and "AutoCAD Mechanical - 3D Development" as well as the computer software s:cripting which i:ncludes how flashing vs' installing works, the difference between single use computers and single board computers, like Arduino how to develop robot arms customized lights a lot of dumb things like that, just for the better understanding of software development and I bought a domain name for web development.. I'm not good at any of this but better then I was when I didn't know any of it.  
 
While this all keeps my mind busy and discussing what I'm going through with a doctor which is helping correct my 'Arkadium Rhythm' <:<:spellcheck<:<: that I've basically destroyed over the years of self abuse, I've come to enjoy 2 family members that are recent to our family. I have yet another bad story with a bad ending involving a lady which i bought my house with that wasn't holding my child, I'm not the first, wont be the last. I had a problem with such development and ignored how much it bothered me.  
 
I couldn't tell you the countless times vie worked on someone's house and refused to be paid or did it knowing no one asked, due they couldn't afford it, didn't know how, or to embarrassed to ask for help. bathrooms, are the biggest that come to mind. I've cleaned up and rebuild peoples houses in their own hopes to have a proper living space for their kid(s) to be released from CFS. I've taken people out of town and changed their surrounding and got them to do projects with me because they were in a bind. let them find their way out hopefully show them what they aren't seeing,  
last example for this post:  
 
My friend had really bad social anxiety I mean real bad. He, (way before I) cut back on the wildness that was created and eventually moved to BC. Either way I told him to stick it out with me and lets go do things.  
((I've done this lots with people went out to do aimless things both cause i always worked and partied and i never understood it when people did nothing when they were upset. To me, it the only thing that makes sense when nothing else does.))  
I took him to, (or ended up at) Canadian tire it was summer. Everyone and their great aunty is in Canadian tire during the summer, and I talked to Everyone. workers, shoppers, people that are likely neither and, -well I guess that's everyone. About prices, how it worked, if they recommend it, when we finally left I asked him how does he feel, his response. he felt great and didn't realize what i was doing. ill leave it there, cause you guess what I did?

yes a little, although i like the outlook view of the big question, this i was hoping was more for the ones who want to to know more about the other side of things some or all of us don't understand.  
 
example: how do we (they) learn what's really happening on these streets. things everyone ignores due misunderstanding of habit, while in the bad or unknown if bad, how does it get better,  
 
i for one remember when i was really addicted to smoking a type of really expensive drug, didn't know how or want to or couldn't comprehend the idea of a balanced lifestyle no one knew cause i didn't say, tell, anyone, later finding out they didn't know why i was shunning everyone out ignored messaged hid under my front door instead of answering it, or asking someone to come over cause i was scared of the worst, but while doing so convinced them I didn't want anyone to actually be here. "So, you call me and ask me to come over but you don't want me to be there, but ya don't want to be alone?" we both laughed about it  
 
i like your post i do, I'm doing this to let both sides of humanity see what they didn't before and ask questions in a theoretical way, on how to get out if they feel they should, and so the ones that wouldn't of known to see how it is if they cares. This is to clear the air on questions that no one knows who to ask, kind of thing (still working on the title des:cription)

You Said it Robin! -Batman  
 
Mended wings with fly again -Alfred  
 
Scratch a pad across my head, what is red is now black instead.. -MR.E

Have you ever wondered how it is that the word stigma means something negative towards entire group of people, normally due to a misunderstanding or questions unasked. Would it of been a word if things were carried differently in society. That by doing so many get stuck either never knowing cause of being labeled or forgotten or forever removed because an on growing problem that the innocents never saw, or a friend hadn't realize what they did, when they said they didn't understand so the option was to leave you behind, never knowing the damage cause no one helped them see, in enessence we all have the same anatomy, i know there's trained professionals, and granted they have faculties, but they go home at night and take days off. I'm not downing their position and I thank their efforts, but i have personal experience and im willing to tell you things first hand (as long as it doesn't involve an individuals name or outing an event that can get someone in trouble)  
 
the bridge is me to you,  
the wall are questions unasked  
 
Questions like: how being treated like scum and being ignored makes one become sullen while trying to be heard, normally the wrong way, cause the guidance they should have are ignoring them and the guidance they're getting drive us all mad.  
 
PS i just noticed in the reply to 4440 my titles is: Where am i 'know' haha correction is: Where am i 'now' (of course)  
 
Edited by ThatGuyYouOnceKnew, 2021-02-20 08:21:59

when Nanya said its a huge wall of text i was making a snap joke maybe a bad one at the wall part, I'm not trying to build a wall (of texts) i'm trying to create a bridge (from me to you)  
I'm a fan of quick jokes with bad timing, what can i say `(ô.ô)/`  
 
Edited by ThatGuyYouOnceKnew, 2021-02-20 08:55:32