Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 2688
One thought
5/10/2018 at 11:36 AM
This is advice based on personal experience, and just throwing this out there to be prepared.
My husband and his siblings are all adopted. He watched as both siblings dragged their parents through the process of finding the birth parents. Neither of his siblings paid any attention to the feelings of his parents, though as an outsider I could see it was hurting them to think these siblings had even the slightest thought that they were not their "real" parents.
Hubby had no desire to find his genetic parents, especially after seeing both of the outcomes were terrible. Both siblings ended up very let down because their birth families were quite messed up. I don't believe to this day either of them acknowledged how appreciative they should be to their parents for adopting them into what was clearly a better life.
Just wanted to put that out there, if she is close with her parents now, please make sure she is aware of their feelings in the process. And that rarely is it a fairy tale ending. I know a lot of people look for birth families out of a desire to feel whole or that they are missing something, when often it will not fill that gap.
Good luck with your search though. Brandon and area are so frightfully small and gossipy you are bound to figure something out.
The reason I make that last statement is that even though I mentioned hubby has no desire to meet or greet his birth family, we are fairly certain we know who his genetic family are due to the gossipy nature of the area he was born. In fact, a family member of mine took it upon themself to show me a yearbook photo of hubby's supposed birth father, and yes, he is the spitting image - so most likely it is true. You just never know.
Best of luck.