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An important message for young women &; others

An important message for young women &; others

anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

An important message for young women &; others
1/12/2020 at 2:12 PM

I am a university student who in the past couple of weeks has had two occasions now where I have felt unsafe. I am posting this because I want to stress to others around Brandon(especially young women) how important it is to be hyperaware of your surroundings....

I will start with the incident that had happened last night. My two friends and I(all 19 year old girls) decided to go out to a lounge to play some pool around 10:30pm after a long day of studying. When we entered the facility my friends had noticed a young man in his fourties that kept turning around and was very obviously staring at us. This wasn't the most unusual thing to happen so we had ignored it and just continued playing pool. So about halfway through our second game our waitress came up to us and said in a very quiet voice "so..... I don't want to startle you guys, but there is an older man at the bar who our staff noticed kept looking at the three of you, then a man who had been sitting near him at the bar watched him make a phone call where he started describing what you guys look like and what each of you were wearing. We are not one hundred percent sure of what's going on but I strongly advise that the three of you leave immediately." At that moment all of our hearts dropped and we quickly grabbed our stuff and scrambled to go get out our wallets and pay. Our waitress then came back and told us she was going to walk us to our car. When we got outside we noticed that there was a car running at the front in the nearly vacant parking lot, there's obviously no way of knowing if it had anything to do with the man who had made the call but we quickly got in our car, immediately locked the doors and sped off as fast as we could while making sure nobody was following us.
So that was one of the two situations, if the man at the bar who overheard the phone call and informed the staff about it is reading this, thank you so much. Who knows what may have happened if you weren't there that day and decided not to report it....

The second situation had happened a few weeks ago. A different group of friends and I were at the oval around 11pm taking pictures by the lights. Nobody else was there except for the three of us(once again a group of 19 year old girls). So as we were taking photos a black vehicle pulled up near us. The man who was driving the vehicle was maybe in his late twenties, and it was just him in the car. He rolled down his window and started saying something to us but none of of could hear him properly. This was at the same time where a bunch of people had been posting stories on Facebook about men approaching girls in the Walmart and Superstore parking lots. I started to worry because I knew some suspicious things had been happening in Brandon so I said to my friends "okay lets go back to your car now and get out of here." So we went to the car and locked the doors, and were about to leave the parking lot when the man who was driving the car moved his car so it was blocking the exit of the parking lot. This is when I started to panic. He stayed there for about a minute then drove up a little bit and parked at the stop sign(this was the road behind the Toyota and co-op dealer ship). He stayed at the stop sign for about 2 minutes while we drove out of the parking lot and kept a distance back, and when he finally moved he made a right turn to the road behind the co-op and we sped past him and got up to 18th street. So he then made a three point turned and pulled out and started to follow us around Brandon. We started going through parking lots and down random streets and he followed us through them all. Thats when I burst out into tears and started begging my friend to drive to the police station but she found it funny and was convinced that we would lose them eventually. I took a picture of the license plate of the car but unfortunately it turned out to be blurry so I couldnt read the plate. Thankfully after about making 2 or 3 u-turns on Victoria we ended up losing him. He was probably following us for about 15 minutes all together. That is seriously the last time I went out to a place that didn't have people around.
The town I grew up in is not what it used to be. I feel scared to go out because I don't know where is safe anymore. Anyways, like I said I posted this because I want people to know what's happening. The idea that "it won't happen to me" is not the mindset anyone should be in. Please stay safe and alert.
nkjames
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 1

nkjames
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 1

please share this story
1/12/2020 at 2:32 PM

Thank you for sharing this. Brandon is becoming less safe and everyone should try to stay aware of their surroundings at all times.
Millenial
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 212

Millenial
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 212

-
1/12/2020 at 3:05 PM

I am so sorry that these experiences have happened to you, but I am glad that you and your friends were able to stay safe.

I am not much older than you are, and in the past couple of years I have also had some creepy experiences (even in broad daylight!) that have made me uncomfortable to the point that if I ever walk alone during the day, it is on main streets with enough traffic that I feel comfortable that someone will see me if something happens. I don't even bother going out at night unless I know that I will be with multiple people that I trust.

This world is dangerous for everyone, but especially for women and children. Like you said, we all need to be vigilant, and we all need to look out for each other. Human trafficking is becoming a larger and larger issue every day.
Summertime
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 931

Summertime
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 931

Sorry
1/12/2020 at 3:34 PM

First of all, good on you for posting this warning, you are very brave Secondly, I’m so sorry that this has happened to you, but thankfully no one was hurt. Unfortunately, It is very true that Brandon is not as safe as it once was. As women, we were taught growing up to always “act like a lady” and to be nice. Well, I say screw that, times have changed! I’m not saying that one shouldn’t be kind to others, but don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself, you don’t have to be “nice” to someone who makes you uncomfortable. Trust your gut!
Also, did you report any of this to police? Might not be a bad idea, could end up saving a life.

Edited by Enter*name*here, 2020-01-12 15:35:24
anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

thank you
1/12/2020 at 4:01 PM

thank you for your response, I agree it is very important stand up for yourself and necessary as well to protect yourself in todays society. I wanted to report the driving incident but I don't have a license plate, but I do know the make and model so maybe it would be worth a try. As for the lounge incident, I was thinking about filing a repor, I know the lounge that I was at had cameras as well so that would definitely help.
anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

agreed
1/12/2020 at 4:06 PM

5 cents worth said "Drive to the Police Station if it happens again.
I would have even called 911 and reported that someone was blocking my exit out of the parking lot and was now following me.
I can already hear people saying NO TO calling 911 but I personally would have - better safe then sorry - and he may have done it to others. "
You're right I for sure should have called 911, I hadn't been in a situation like that before but I now know that if it ever happens again it'll be the first thing I do. Like I mentioned my friends didn't take it as seriously unlike I who was panicking so I think them acting like it was kind of a joke made me feel like I didn't need do anything, which is so wrong which I realized after. but thank you for your response
JustASoul
Joined: Dec 2018
Posts: 356

JustASoul
Joined: Dec 2018
Posts: 356

embarrassed
1/12/2020 at 5:07 PM

As a male in my 40's who admittedly appreciates the look of a younger woman at times, I am completely embarrassed by the actions of some of my gender. I sincerely hope some, if not all, of these predators face consequences for their ridiculous behavior and moronic attitudes.
Kimmie34
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 284

Kimmie34
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 284

kudos......
1/12/2020 at 6:10 PM

To the waitress for giving you a heads up and walking you and your friends out to the car. No one should feel unsafe. They say it takes a village to raise a child, but I also believe people need to watch out for others as well, no matter the age. My gfs and I always watch out for others, maybe it’s the mom in us that’s makes us do that. I’m glad you are safe.
Wildflower1
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 272

Wildflower1
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 272

Police?
1/12/2020 at 6:43 PM

Did you notify the police on either incident? I have seen a few different post on social media regarding similar situations: I’m curious if anyone is notifying the police? I’m very confident in BPS and I’d like to think that they would make a public statement after these situations (if they knew about them), just like they do when children are approached on playgrounds etc.

If you knew you were being followed, call 911! Back in the day when cell phones weren’t common, I would have suggested that you drive to the police station, as others have suggested.

I’m glad you and your friends are safe!

Edited by dthbysqts, 2020-01-12 18:52:31
anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

police
1/12/2020 at 6:44 PM

dthbysqts said "Do you notify the police on either incident? I have seen a few different post on social media regarding similar situations; I’m curious if anyone is notifying the police? I’m very confident in BPS and I’d like to think that they would make a public statement after these situations (if they knew about them), just like they do when children are approached on playgrounds etc.

If you knew you were being followed, call 911! Back in the day when cell phones weren’t common, I would have suggested that you drive to the police station, as others have suggested.

I’m glad you and your friends are safe! "
yes we are going to the police to make a statement tonight!
coloda
Joined: Dec 2018
Posts: 7

coloda
Joined: Dec 2018
Posts: 7

give picture to police
1/12/2020 at 9:21 PM

That picture you took, give it to the police anyway, they have the technology and may be able to figure clues out. AND maybe link it to the guy in the lounge?

I think that it's very important to report. I've been hearing of other shady things happening. I was down town couple month ago and a young lady said she was being followed (she was getting help, but I'm not sure if it was reported).

I once reported a minor incident to police and I said I'm not sure if it's important. He said it's good to report minor situations because it might be the clue that is needed to link things together.

Your story in not minor, it is a big concern. There is something going on and the police will benefit from knowing your story.
AndreaD.
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 797

AndreaD.
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 797

Self defense classes
1/12/2020 at 9:30 PM

Sorry to hear about what you have been through in such a short time. I strongly suggest that you should go to Kirin or another martial arts studio in Brandon and take a self defense class. Perhaps your friends would like to go with you.
Just knowing you are able to defend yourself will do much to improve how safe you feel...because you will be much safer.
SkyeSoul
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 36

SkyeSoul
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 36

Skating Oval Creepers
1/13/2020 at 8:47 AM

Last year I had a similar situation where I was skating with my boyfriend at the oval and there were lots of families there but it was dark out and as we were leaving a car put their brights on us so we couldn’t see who it was but we assumed it was accidentally. When we actually started to leave me noticed a different vehicle pull up a foot behind us so we were making a t shape and we couldn’t back up with how we were parked so we were being blocked by someone and then this other car was blinding us with their lights. They finally rolled down their windows and were yelling stuff at us which we were very confused and annoyed by them blocking us and blinding us and then even honked a couple times but eventually my boyfriend got annoyed and just drove through a bit of snow to get away from them. It wasn’t like they just wanted our parking spot they seemed very upset and I know we should have seen what they were upset about but we actually thought these people were going to hurt us if we got out because of how aggressive they were acting. I still to this day have no idea what happened but I would suggest never to get out of the vehicle if something similar happens and just get their license plate and talk to them later with police if there is actually a problem.
HammerHead
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 147

HammerHead
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 147

Why not call the Police
1/13/2020 at 9:11 AM

Why not call the Police when these incidents are happening ?
coffeefan
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 2101

coffeefan
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 2101

call
1/13/2020 at 11:13 AM

Hopefully you reported this situation.
Irie Mon
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 368

Irie Mon
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 368

Advice From A Cop
1/13/2020 at 12:58 PM

I was a cop in a mid size Canadian city for 33 years and my message to Anonymous Girl and every other person reading this thread, please, please, call the police at the very moment you feel threatened. Do not wait until after or don't feel pressured by your friends that think the situation is just a joke. Call the police. This is what the police are out there for and this is what the 911 system was developed for, people is distress. You will never be berated or talked down to by the police even if it turns out to be nothing. If it does turn out to be nothing, at the very very least, the police will have names on file so if these as$holes try it again they can be called out for it.
I was working a day shift one day when 911 got a hang up call from a young female. Hang up calls are a common occurrence but the operator on this call just had a funny feeling and pursued the matter. They found the location of her general area and I was dispatched. I located her hiding and scared sick because she was being followed by a much older man while walking home. My police service K-9 teams were training that day and within a matter of minutes I had 2 K-9 teams, 2 patrol cars, 2 detective cars and even a couple of traffic units. Why, because this is taken as a very serious matter. Buddy was finally located and as it turns out, he was a high risk sex offender and arrested.
Please Anonymous Girl don't become disillusioned or give up on all humanity because of my story. It was a one in a million occurrence, but it does happen and please, please call the police at the time. Don't wait until later.
Jackson67
Joined: This month
Posts: 91

Jackson67
Joined: This month
Posts: 91

Hmm..
1/13/2020 at 1:25 PM

Irie Mon said "I was a cop in a mid size Canadian city for 33 years and my message to Anonymous Girl and every other person reading this thread, please, please, call the police at the very moment you feel threatened. Do not wait until after or don't feel pressured by your friends that think the situation is just a joke. Call the police. This is what the police are out there for and this is what the 911 system was developed for, people is distress. You will never be berated or talked down to by the police even if it turns out to be nothing. If it does turn out to be nothing, at the very very least, the police will have names on file so if these as$holes try it again they can be called out for it.
I was working a day shift one day when 911 got a hang up call from a young female. Hang up calls are a common occurrence but the operator on this call just had a funny feeling and pursued the matter. They found the location of her general area and I was dispatched. I located her hiding and scared sick because she was being followed by a much older man while walking home. My police service K-9 teams were training that day and within a matter of minutes I had 2 K-9 teams, 2 patrol cars, 2 detective cars and even a couple of traffic units. Why, because this is taken as a very serious matter. Buddy was finally located and as it turns out, he was a high risk sex offender and arrested.
Please Anonymous Girl don't become disillusioned or give up on all humanity because of my story. It was a one in a million occurrence, but it does happen and please, please call the police at the time. Don't wait until later. "
"A cop in a mid sized Canadian city for 33 years..." Yet your profile says you were a copper in Brandon for 33 years haha. But either way your advice is very good and I just wanted to say thank you for taking the time to share it with others. Hope you're enjoying retirement.

Oh and mynameistrain you can call 911 from any cell phone, it does not matter if it is activated or not it will work for emergencies.

Edited by Jackson67, 2020-01-13 13:28:13
peopleperson

Joined: Aug 2016
Posts: 119

peopleperson
Joined: Aug 2016
Posts: 119

Safe in Brando
1/13/2020 at 9:02 PM

You should call the police in case others have similar experiences
anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

anonymous_girl
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 5

thank you
1/13/2020 at 10:53 PM

Hello! First I wanted to say wow thank you for your reply, it was very well written. The story you told is unbelievable but I'm very glad that the girl ended up okay. As for calling the police I know that in the second situation I wrote I should've called them when the car started following us. My thought was to go drive straight to the police station but unfortunately I wasn't the one driving, I had been begging my friend to go straight there but like I mentioned she didn't take the matter as seriously as I had. Being in a situation like that for the first time is quite scary and I think that since my friends have now seen the post and comments that they will react differently next time. As for the first scenario, a police report was made after the matter happened. I think the reason why nobody had called the police when we were there was because at that point the man hadn't done anything illegal, he was just being very creepy. Thinking back on it I wonder if they could've called the police to come and investigate the man but in that moment we were all genuinely so scared and just wanted to get out of there. I don't know why a person would be describing what we look like and what we are wearing. It stills gives me chills thinking about it. Anyways, for those reading this thank you to everyone for sharing my post! Im glad that the word is getting spread.

Edited by anonymous_girl, 2020-01-13 23:17:49
Exhausted
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1756

Exhausted
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1756

bar incident
1/14/2020 at 12:03 AM

Be super careful trusting anyone. Even your waitress / waiter could have been the one that was taking you to danger rather than safety. And if they were not, how much protection could they have given?

Stay where others are and call 911.

Police would rather have you call and safe rather than find you hurt or killed later.

Trust your instincts no matter what the people with you are saying.
sammy
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8749

sammy
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8749

..
1/14/2020 at 11:19 AM

Angelshugyou...in December, something almost identical to your story happened as well. I was sitting in the food court and noticed an older man approach 2 young females and ask them a bunch of questions. The one girl was doing her best to ignore him but her friend was answering him but looked uncomfortable. I didn’t know if I was being paranoid but it felt off to me so I stayed and watched them until the man eventually left them alone. Like you said, it could have been totally innocent but when we get those weird vibes, I think it’s important that we listen to our gut.

OP, I’m so glad you are okay. The bar incident is incredibly creepy! I also wondered why the bar staff didn’t call police so that they could have checked things out but sometimes we don’t think of those things in the moment. Did you make the police report? It would be nice if the bar gets named because I would definitely support the place! Good for them to keep their patrons safe
Triplethreat
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 960

Triplethreat
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 960

Just Thought
1/14/2020 at 5:15 PM

Angelshugyou said "never said the guy at the mall WAS a rapist child abductor that needs to be neutered. I wasn't 'a little overly paranoid' as you put it. It seemed odd he zoomed in there as soon as her bf left, then when her bf came back to see if she was ok and who was this guy approaching his gf, that guy didnt even look at her bf and left like a min after he came back to her...obviously her bf thought there was a reason to go back to her when that guy approached her. and there were other people he could have asked around his own age or the food stands. As I pointed out it may have just been a legit question, but it seemed off with such a age difference. I was being cautious and not paranoid and dont care what you think...I was concerned of the girl, and won't change how I look out for someone just because you or anyone else thinks Im being 'a little overly paranoid'...And creeps do use innocent questions like directions to lure people, kids etc if possible or ask for help etc.
I said I hope the guys who are doing this crap (trying to grab girls etc) are the ones to get neutered.
Its Angelshugyou not Angelhugs....

Edited by Angelshugyou, 2020-01-14 12:42:57"
I'd point out that Paul Bernardo wasn't very old when he was doing the things he did. He wasn't "scruffy" looking either. Older guys who look scruffy aren't necessarily the ones doing this stuff and certainly aren't the only ones doing it.
Triplethreat
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 960

Triplethreat
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 960

I Agree That
1/14/2020 at 5:29 PM

myhandleistrain said "It always amazes me that it Canada, law abiding citizens are not allowed to carry non lethal self defense instruments. Pepper spray might save someone from getting assaulted. This law needs to change, in my opinion, as a person absolutely has the right to defend themselves. Hard to do if you are out numbered or out weighed. "
The laws regarding self defense are stupid. Call the cops, if you can, and then wait. If the attacker kills you before the cops can get there, at least the police will have a crime scene to investigate. Then, if they figure out who they're looking for and catch the criminal, maybe he'll get a few years before getting out.
sammy
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8749

sammy
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 8749

5 cents worth
1/14/2020 at 5:42 PM

I agree with you. In October we had something happening outside of our house and I wasn’t sure if I should call 911 or the non emergency police number. I felt like 911 was extreme for the situation but when talking to a police officer about it later, he said to call 911 if anything happened again like that and that 911 was the place to call when you feel unsafe.