I'm with macncheese on this one
7/22/2016 at 9:43 AM
| | macncheese said "Why do women have to be nice to you just because they are women and you granted them the experience of talking to you?
You don't deserve nor are you entitled to someone's attention just because you want it and 'ask' for it by trying to start a conversation. " |
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Being courteous is one thing, I absolutely agree that everyone should extend common courtesy.
But the expectation for females to smile and act nicely at the whim of men (or other women) frustrates me to no end.
I have been harassed and cat-called with vulgar language in broad daylight in a safe part of the city while pushing my child in a stroller. When I mentioned it to a few men in my life-men that I trust and who care about me-their response was that I should brush it off and take it as a compliment. THIS IS A PROBLEM. When even the good guys don't get it and don't see this behaviour as harassment, women lose trust in strangers. It's as simple as that.
I'm not accusing the OP of harassing anyone. I'm just saying that you have no idea what the women you're approaching have encountered. They may be reacting defensively for a reason, and it may have nothing to do with you.
So. My advice? Start with a self-deprecating joke or a thoughtful compliment (not about looks!) to break the ice. If she is interested she will respond.