Discussions

This is going to be a bit of a backward post but here it goes. I am a male, currently engaged in an abusive relationship with my fiancee, no she is not abusive to me, I am abusive to her and I hate it. Dont get me wrong, I do not hate her, I love her more than I ever have imagined that I could love someone. But I have somewhere along the line have become abusive. I hate it, I hate to see the pain I cause her, I hate to see her cry like that. And yet somehow whenever we get into an argument things escalate again and there we are. I do not hit her, but almost everything short of that I do and I am deeply ashamed of it. We are scheduled to be married in a month and at this moment it looks like that may not even happen. I am desperate, I do not want to lose her, I really do love her a lot. Does anyone have some sort of advice that they could give? I know that many people could be offended by this post, and to them I appologize. But please, if anyone can help me, please say something.