Discussions

An awful person who deserves what she gets. I try to be nice and do nice things and I get crapped on.

Just want to go to sleep and never wake up.

I have been married a good long time and let me tell you that even in marriage you can be more alone than you could ever imagine. I love my husband very much and always have... but...I have not always liked him and I am sure he would say the same. We have grown together and apart many times over the years. We have been both in and out of sync. We have been married many many years and at least 10 of them were blissful. Those 10 were not necessarily in a row or even complete years but I cannot imagine ever being with anyone else. At the end of the day, a marriage means being in and out of love but always overcoming.  
If you are looking for Mr. or Mrs. Perfect, they don't exist except in the minds of the single and hopeful or on the tongues of those too afraid to speak the truth.  
The OP asked if there was anyone out there that you couldn't breathe without? Some days yes and others I would like to knock the wind out of him!  
Truth is...I cannot imagine my life without him!  
 
Good luck in you quest but take the bad with the good because if you don't you might miss out.

I should just give up then.

Have no one to talk to other than strangers.

Well this has escalated quickly into a serious cry for help! I believe it's time that you (shaggy) try to understand that perhaps there may be a more serious problem and it may not be your best option to get help from a bunch of couch psychiatrists (myself included). Look to the professionals.  
 
There is nothing wrong with having a pity party, but what matters is how long you choose to stay in it.

I hope you are still reading this.

lovemystery said "Well this has escalated quickly into a serious cry for help! I believe it's time that you (shaggy) try to understand that perhaps there may be a more serious problem and it may not be your best option to get help from a bunch of couch psychiatrists (myself included). Look to the professionals.     There is nothing wrong with having a pity party, but what matters is how long you choose to stay in it. "

I agree with lovemystery. Like I said before I understand the feeling of not being worthy and I knew I had to get it together for my kids. I didn't want to get worse because I want to see them grow up and I do love life too much. But it has taken a long way to get here. In my small town it was talking to the health nurse. I saw her probably about 5 times to get me out of that powerful rut of despair after my husband and I split up. Please Shaggy, go talk to your doctor who can refer you to someone to talk to. Or call the mood disorders. And, don't feel like it is bad that you feel this way, a lot of people have had bouts of anxiety and depression, but we here are all couch psychiatrists. You need to speak with someone who is a professional. If you want more help in finding contacts/resources we can do that but we can't diagnose or remedy.

First of all - Love doesn't "just happen". It takes work to make that connection, and it takes work to maintain it.  
 
Second - Whats with all the man bashing in the earlier posts? These are stereotypes. To say that men basically want a maid who happens to provide bed side nookie is ridiculous. MEN and WOMEN of this day and age are self absorbed, selfish, and are always looking for the bigger, better deal. Its just as easy for a man to look for something better as it is for a woman.  
 
I do agree that the OP should look into councelling, but when you meet someone with the instant goal of "are you the one" you already have extremely high expectation of that person and inadvertantly put an extreme amount of pressure on them.  
 
What worries me is that the OP is associating "love" and "happiness" rather then looking for happiness in the pursuit of love. There are many things in this life that can provide happiness on many levels. Having the love of another should never determine your happiness levels. This is something I have just come to learn and I am working to find joys in the simple pleasures of life.  
 
Definitely seek counselling... all of the strangers in the world can tell you all the positive messages, but from the last few posts, you will not believe them. But on the first page you describe yourself as being worthwhile, and now you are saying you are worthless. That is a very quick change of heart and I do think you should seek councelling or therapy.  
 
Edited by BlutEngelGirl13, 2015-09-21 14:39:13